More On Responsbile & Accountable.

Most recent results from dicting around (New Oxford American) with the words responsbile & accountable.

Responsible is an adjective that applies to anyone who is in charge of an endeavor or to whom a duty has been delegated, and who is subject to penalty or blame in case of default (: responsible for getting everyone out of the building in the event of a fire).

Accountable is more positive than responsible... suggesting that something has been entrusted to someone who will be called to account for how that trust has been carried out (: she was directly accountable to the department head for the funds that had been allocated to her group).

Short cut: Have to. Choose to.

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3 Questions For Accountability

 

 

 

Throughout much of The Power To Transform we're consistently given opportunities to build a variety of "muscles." Many of them brand new. Almost all of our muscles under-utilized and in need of more strength, flexibility and toning. So it is with Accountability. 

Chris sets out three simple questions which, when asked in the proper sequence AND in the present moment that a situation is right in front of us, quickly and clearly show us the choice to be Accountable— or not. 

 

What's so?

So what?

Now what?

 

"What's so?" is what happened sans editorial comment. It's a grounded assessment of the situation from as fully aware and as objective as possible observation.

"So what?" is the place where the "victim" hangs out; the space where fault-finding & blame live. ALL our actions have consequences and that's what they are, consequences. Neither right or wrong, good or bad. They may be wanted or unwanted and they are simply something that opens some possibilities and closes others.

"Now what?" Action— effective action— based on a free & clear choice, unencoumbered by drama, coming from center, calm, peaceful, present & powerful.

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Responsibility vs. Accountability

 

"Accountability is a choice I make about how I'm going to approach life and every situation in it. Accountability is not the same as responsibility, which can be delegated or assigned by another person; accountability occurs only by personal choice."
  — Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

 

 

Responsibility — What I have to do.
Accountability — What I choose to do.

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"I Always Have a Choice." Really?

I mean, "Always... In all ways"?

When I created BeliefBusters I wrote:

What your mind believes you will achieve—
always and in all ways.

What (one thing) I've learned from The Power To Transform, is that a belief is a story, an internal narrative we tell ourselves about ourselves and the world in which we live & work & have our being. That story is an interpretation, an opinion, an assessment and it's NOT true or false (right or wrong, good or bad). It's just a story.

Thing is, we ACT out of our stories, which is why what we believe we will achieve. Our beliefs (stories, assessments) dictate & direct the actions we take.

So, if we encounter the opportunity to make a choice, that choice has to be made based on our beliefs— our stories/assessments we hold about ourselves in that domain.

All my stories are FICTION. They are not REAL. I made them up. They are creations in my mind. And because they are, I can make up a new one— anytime I want.

And... a new story may be what's required to make a new & empowring choice.

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UNcollapsing My Life

When little children play with building blocks they seem to get as much joy— maybe even more joy— when the blocks collapse and all fall down. (Guess it's a "London Bridge" is... kind of thing <smile>)

Doesn't work that way for grown ups. When things are collapsing or collapseed in our lives... it's a mess. Minimum, we've got a clean up ahead of us. Max... a total re-build.

In The Power To Transform, Chris Majer focuses on the distinction of things being "Domain Specific." What happens in Vegas doesn't happen every, perhaps any, where else. Impatience in parenting does not mean you're impatient with business associates. Impatience, and all assessments, and (I'm guessing) all willingnesses, abilities, choices, commitments... ARE "Domain Specific." Everything is.

When I colapse these things together, I run into trouble. When I separate them and see what's OPEN and CLOSED in that domain, I get to look freshly at all other domains in my life and learn if that's so in this one or that one, too.

That gives me a new-found freedom to make wiser & more empowering choices.

Please, let me know what you think...

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A Fundamental Choice

Like an assessment, a choice opens some poossibilities and closes others. My call partner, the Honorable Arnold Hella, reminded me of a most essential choice we all make every day— consciously or no. It's a line from the movie Shawshank Redemption, spoken by both characters, Tim Robbin's Andy Dufresne and Morgan Freeman's Red.

 

"Get busy living, or get busy dying."

Of course it's "domain specific" <smile>. What possibilities does getting busy with either one open & close for you?

Please, let me know what you think...

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I always have a choice.

"The most challenging, and ultimately the most liberating, aspect of this declaration is its absoluteness. I am not offering you any back doors here. No exceptions, ifs, ands or buts. To shape yourself and your world, this declaration has to be absolute.

In each and every moment, you have a choice. What you do with those moments and choices is up to you, but they are all yours. Every moment, you choose.

There is no end to choosing and no escaping choice. You can see this as a blessing or a curse or accept it as it is intended: a challenge to rise to, a means to temper yourself and to forge a new you."
— Chris Majer The Power To Transform

I always have a choice.

Please, let me know what you think...

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I Am a Novice

The Japanese kangji (Chinese character) below is "sho shin" and it means "beginners mind." In The Power To Transform, Chris Majer writes about the "Learning Zone," the stair-step levels of competence that begin (odly enough <smile>) with Beginner and go up to > Novice > Competent > Proficient, Virtuoso and end with the top level of MASTER.

For most of my adult life I have been unwilling to be seen as a beginner at anything! THAT is a BIG one of the "enemies of learning." I am happy to report & declare that in terms of Transformation— yours, mine, anybody's— I am a novice. Very freeing. Feels good <smile>.

And... one of my favorite habits is a thing I call dicting around, which simply means going to the dictionary and exploring a word's meaning. Here's more about the word novice.

novice |ˈnävəs|

noun:

• a person new to or inexperienced in a field or situation: he was a complete novice in foreign affairs.

• a person who has entered a religious order and is under probation, before taking vows.

• an animal, esp. a racehorse, that has not yet won a major prize or reached a level of performance to qualify for important events.

ORIGIN Middle English : from Old French, from late Latin novicius, from novus ‘new.’

THE RIGHT WORD
All of these nouns are used to describe someone who has not yet acquired the skills and experience needed to qualify for a trade, a career, a profession, or a sphere of life.

Beginner is the most general and informal term, used to describe someone who has begun to acquire the necessary skills but has not yet mastered them (: violin lessons for beginners).

An apprentice is also a beginner, usually a young person, who is serving under a more experienced master or teacher to learn the skills of a trade or profession (: an apprentice to one of the great Renaissance painters). In a broad sense, apprentice refers to any beginner whose efforts are unpolished.

Novice implies that the person lacks training and experience (: a novice when it came to writing fiction), while neophyte is a less negative term, suggesting that the person is eagerly learning the ways, methods, or principles of something (: he was a neophyte at this type of sailing).

A probationer is a beginner who is undergoing a trial period, during which he or she must prove an aptitude for a certain type of work or life (: she was a lowly probationer, with no privileges or status).

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Heck, I'm even willing to be a probationer with this stuff.

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The Wisdom of Choice

Choices: We all make them conatsntly and often unconsciously. To some extent this is understandable, as you don't want to spend energy and attention on choosing to breathe, blinking your eyes, or taking each step. If we consciously make every choice in our lives, then we'd be paralyzed by the immense number of choices we have to make. Thankfully our bodies have a wisdom of their own and have relieved us of much of that burden. At the same time...

We all too often go on autopilot when making choices that have a much bigger impact on us.

— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

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Once again, Awareness is Job #1. The practice is to become increasingly more aware of the choices we make— especially the important ones. Choices that matter. Those choices that are at the heart of the matter or all about what's the matter.

What there is to do is...

A great exercise from the book to train your observer and increase you awareness of choice is to write down five choices you make each day. Big ones, little ones, any kind or category of choice: From brushing your teeth and taking out the trash, to calling a long-lost friend and re-connecting, and cleaning up an incompletion (personal or professional) from the present where you are out of integrity. Pick a choice. Any choice. Just do five AND list a couple of ways each choice OPENS possibilities and CLOSES them.

In a week you WILL be a far keener observer of the role of choice in your life & work. Which means, in a word, you will have increased your WISDOM. That's a good thing.

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Before

What, Me Accountable?

 

<smile>

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Being Accountable. Asking "What's right?"

In yesterday's post, Accountability - The Way of Transformation I quoted this line from the book:

When you are being accountable, you focus on
what is working rather than what is wrong.

It immediately brought to mind an old friend and mentor and book, Breaking The Rules by Kurt Wright. Kurt's "Five Right Questions" are all about focusing on what's right and not what's wrong.

"What's right?" questions build energy. "What's wrong?" questions drain energy— literally.

Although Kurt didn't focus on Choice as Chris does, it's clear he was suggesting we choose to ask "What's right?" And we always can... in any situation. Another way Kurt expressed this was in pointing out that we are either...

Finding Fault or Finding Value

Kurt's first two "Right Questions" fall right in line with The Power To Transform.

1. What's right... What's working?

2. What makes that right... What makes that work so well?

I get a special pleasure (and power) when two teachers & teachings I admire fit together so seamlessly. 

When you are being accountable, you ask "What's right?"

Does it then follow that when you're asking "What's right?" you're being accountable?

Let me know what you think of that <smile>

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Accountability - The Way of Transformation

When you choose to be accountable, every new situation becomes a challenge and an opportunity to learn.

The wider you expand your horizon of accountability, the more freedon you gain from the cycle of guilt, blame and shame that can narrow both your own lives and the lives of others.

When you are being accountable, you focus on what is working rather than what is wrong.

If you choose to be a victim, then you will procrastinate, fail to meet your responsibilities, and invent elaborate excuses to explain how your failures weren't your fault.

When you're being accountable, you are always choosing and you own the consequences of your choices.

When you are accountable, your life becomes more interesting and rewarding.

When you are accountable, you don't get caught up in pointless drama and you move through a world of your own creation with dignity and grace.

Victims tend to complain and suffer from all of life's problems. They are easily confused and frustrated. They often have an inflated sense of themselves as a defense mechanism and, curiously, seem to know everything already.

When you are accountable, you move from center. You tend to be enthusiastic, vibrant, alive and aware, enjoying a sense of genuine inner peace, a strong self-image and a commitment to authrntic learning as a way of life.

Choose accountability.

It's the only "Way of Transformation."

From The Power To Transform by Chris Majer.

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I Am Accountable

"To be accountable is to take ownership of all the events, actions and outcomes in your life."
— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

 

I am accountable.

I am the causel force in my life.

I am unwilling to delegate the fundamental creative power in my life to any one or any thing other than myself.

I do not wait for any person or entity outside of me to set the purpose & direction for my life.

I alone own my successes & failures.

I am the reason my life is the way it is.

I am accountable.

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Awareness Is Job #1

Ford Motor Co. made "Quality Is Job 1" a household slogan in the 1980s. Time for a change (not at Ford <smile>), with you and me.

Awareness Is Job #1

Awareness of what?

Everything.

Developing an increasing Awareness of and about all of the elements that make up your life & work— assessments, making choices, ways to learn and not learn, what you are able to do... what you are willing to do... being accountable, making and keeping commitments— is fundamental to your capacity and power to transform.

"In order to change yourself, you must first see yourself. Developing awareness means becoming a more competent observer of yourself and your world. You must develop the capacity to observe your body, your emotions, and your internal and external conversations."

How do my conversations create my reality?

How do the ways I carry and care for my body determine my experience of myself and my life?

How do my moods and emotions shape my world?"

— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

The questions are the answer.

Love to learn what you think of this. Please, let me know...

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"I am committed to..."

I jumped ahead in my studies of The Power To Transform, and where we are working together as a group to learn more about the power & purpose of Commitment. It's not like taking a short-cut. Simply I wanted to learn more about it, because that's what's coming around on the guitar for me.

Given that, this...

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A commitment is a particular type of declaration. It is the means by whch we bring ourselves forth into the world.

Commitment is the move that announcs to the world what it is you intend to accomplish and as such open the possibility for new actions for yourself and others.

Critical to the nature of commitment is that it also calls forth the power of your will to achieve what you have declared yourself committed to. A commitment is a critically powerful move. It is a means by which you embody and measure your intention and focus your will...

Action begins when you make the declaration,

"I am committed to..."

Before that statement there is only possibilty; afterward there is certainty.

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Desires & Choice - from Adam Khan

Adam Khan is one of my favorites. Always thought-full & thought-provoking, which is WHY he's one of my favorites. He does MoodRaiser.com and when you visit his site you can sign-up for his free newsletter which comes to you via eMail. It's a once in a while deal, so you've no fear of being bombarded. Adam is a gentle soul. And his website is a very rich resource of some of the most solid "Self-Help" material out there.

What's below is the most recent newsletter I received. The subject is "Desire," and for students of The Power To Transform, the subject is also about what we're studying now, Choice. It's coming from a very different angle than Chris approaches and, transformation it is. Hope it's useful for you...

Attaining the Mood Called "Bliss"
Posted: 06 Dec 2010 11:52 PM PST

ON VACATION many years ago, I was reading the Bhagavad Gita, one of Hinduism's holy books. It's basically a conversation between Arjuna (a charioteer about to go into battle) and a spirit. The spirit is urging Arjuna to let go of his attachment to the outcome of the battle. And all throughout the book, there is a continuous urge to let go of desires, to give up desiring.

This gave me an idea. I was on vacation and I had plenty of time, so I decided to try an experiment. I did a kind of meditation that lasted for several hours. I normally fidget a lot and have a hard time sitting still for long periods, but without any goal to sit still for so long, I was quite content to stay sitting there for hours because what I was doing made me feel contented.

All I did the whole time was notice when I had a desire, and then decide to let that desire go.

For the first time I realized I don't have any control over what I desire. Desires come up on their own. Just sitting there, one desire after another would pop up. I wanted to move my position. I wanted the pain in my leg to go away. I wanted to get up and have something to eat. I wanted to get rich. I wanted people to like me. I wanted things to go well at work. I wanted I wanted I wanted. One after another, this seemingly endless fountain of desires came forth. That part I had no control over.

But I did have some control after that point. I can decide on a desire or not. I may have the desire to have a beer, but then I can decide, "Nah, I don't really want one, now that I think about it."

In other words, I don't really control whether or not a desire comes up. But I do control whether I hang onto that desire or let it go (by deciding against it).

So that's all I did for several hours. I payed attention to when a desire came up, which was several per minute, and then each time, I decided to let the desire go. I simply decided No, I don't really want that now.

I achieved a kind of bliss I didn't think was possible without heavy medication. That was one of the most deeply peaceful experiences I have ever had in my life. I was completely at ease. I had found bliss and tranquillity.

Of course, most of my life is oriented toward goals, and that's the way I like it. I don't want to simply sit still and live in peace without doing anything worthwhile. But I now know where it comes from when I am discontented. It comes from desires. And I know that any time I want to decend into the well of deep peace and quench my thirst for bliss, I have a way. And now you do too

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I Always Have a Choice— Always and In All Ways

 

Posted this one again, because I chose to remind myself of what it said.

 

The most fundamentally powerful declaration an individual can make is also the most basic:

             I always have a choice.

If you look at your life from that declarative space, then you will see that everything you are, everything that you do, everything that you have, is the direct and sole result of the countless choices you have made during the course of your life.

You choose your attitudes, opinions, beliefs, behavior, points of view and responses to life. You choose your career path and your particular job. You choose all of your relationships and the condition of your relationships. Through your choices regarding eating, drinking, smoking and exercise, you have chosen the state of your health, your bodily shape and appearance, and, to a significant degree, the length of your life.

Ultimately, your entire life is a result of the choices you have made.

from The Power To Transform
— Chris Majer

Let me know what you think.

PS. You did notice the little person is doing the two step... yes? <smile>

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My New Enemy Of Learning

There are 11 "Enemies of Learning" listed in The Power To Transform.

Knowing... Unwilling to be a beginer... We are blind to our blindness... Comfort zone... Understanding... Opinions are NOT learning. Awareness is NOT competence... The magic bullet... The essential role of the body... Novelty... Living in constant assessment... and Characterization.

I got another one. (And yes, I am so proud of myself <smile>)

Comparrison.

Whoa... good one! And I do it all the time. You?

I compare myself to others— especially unfair comparrisons. "Fantasy standards" Mr. Majer called them. Comparring myself to Brad & Angelina... Other writters (like mega-best selling ones, Michael Lewis & J. K. Rowling)... Internet & Internetwork marketers (you know the ones; the guys who make $1,697, 480 in a day with a new product launch)... Coaches... business people... younger people... older people... Always people who I characterize as way more successful than I am in any domain. 

I even compare myself to myself. The ghosts of Christmas past, even Christmas future.

Crazy.

So, I hear you ask, good coach and call partner that you are: "What possibilities does that comparrison assessment open for you John? And what possibilities does that close?"

Indeed. <smile>.

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"We don't learn anything just by reading..."

"We don't learn anything just by reading..." Mr. Majer said.

Oh my... That's too bad. Wasted a lot of years thinking I did <smile>

And isn't that a "Shoot yourself in the foot" thing for an author to say?

If you're interested in learning more about that remark, here's a clip of a Conversation I did a ways (not long) ago with Chris Majer about his book The Power To Transform exploring a number of the concepts in the book.

Click the player below to listen to the (03:37) Mp3: 

C04-ChrisMajer-Preview02(Learning:Distinctions:Action)

To listen/download via the url: Click here.

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Take an Adult Time-Out

When you were in kindergarten, did the teacher have a "Time-out chair"— a place a child was sent to sit alone & quietly for about five minutes when he or she misbehaved or "broke the rules" in some way?

I'm 60+, so I came along before that idea took its present shape. We were simply told to go stand in the corner— those of us who didn't have a tennis ball thrown at our heads or have Sister Mary Margret Machette rap us on the knuckles with a ruler. Surely, it is a kinder & gentler & safer world for children today— as well as more "politically correct" and parentially enlightened.

Enough backstory. As with the kindergartener's chair, an "Adult Time-Out" is a  five-minute go away to a place & space sans every distraction you can manage; quiet, no other sounds (as best you can).

You do NOT have to be "bad," or break any rules or misbehave to take an Adult Time-out. But if you have been, it's a perfect thing to do. It's useful any time you get "off center" or even just to refresh and re-align yourself during the day.

You can do it standing (recommended) or sitting (just fine). Standing is recommended because your skelton is doing it's whole-body job, instead of your butt doing a half-as... You got the idea. <smile>

If you stand, do so with feet shoulder's width apart, knees slightly flexed NOT locked, arms hanging at your sides comfortably. You might want to roll your shoulders & shake out your arms and legs first, just to get loose & relax.

If you're sitting, do so with feet flat on the floor, arms positioned so as NOT to have your shoulders hunched up in any way; palms up or down, on your thighs or in your lap. Most importantly, back straight and eyes level aimed at the horizon.

Game is, "assume the position" and begin to breathe in and out... slowly... naturally... deeply (as you can), but gently (do NOT force your breathing). And breathe from your center, what the Japansese call your "Hara," a palm's width below your navel half way between your back and your front, and centered left to right.

As you breathe, FOCUS your attention on your breathing: In... Out... In... Out... In... Out... Again, breathe from your center and be AWARE of breathing from your center.

That's it. That's all there is to it. Five minutes. An "Adult Time-out."

Some hints: You WILL get distracted with thoughts other than In... & Out... Just let them go. If they get too "sticky," just let that go. Let go. Let GOD, if that's your style.

& I HIGHLY recommend you have a timer. If I don't have a timer, I get all busy thinking about how long its been, how much more time to go and that fakaka. My timer came from Amazon and cost $10 and change. Unfortunately, as soon as my wife Katyusha saw mine she wanted one for her & the kids to time their music lessons... and one for the kitchen... and one for measuring our sex lives... Okay, the last one was a joke (I hope <smile).

So... that's the deal. I won't share now how my Adult Time-out are going. Later— after I hear from you about yours.

Please, let me know how this goes for you.

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7 Power Questions For Your Transformation

Taking The Power To Transform seriously is hard work.

I don't think I'd get any argument from any of the folks I know who are engaged in its' study. "Hard work" is obviously an assessment, and as such OPENS and CLOSES possibilities. I like working hard, because it feels good and the way I have it— life— wired, hard work is required to achieve any thing (relationships, wealth, success, transformation, even fun...) worthwhile.

One example of what I "mean" by hard work are the questions below.

In the Mentor-Coaching program, we have Call Partners who ask and answer a set of questions with each other daily. The questions that follow are from that Call Partnership.

What they do is to focus on a riggorous examination of a given assessment. Besides becoming more clear about THAT one assessment itself, it's great training in becoming competent as an observer; present, connected and open to learning at a new and (I say) higher level about yourself and the world and how to operate (with both) with increasing freedom & power.

Were you (any of you & me) to make the time every day to pick one assessment, any assessment, and put it through its' paces below... in a very short time you would improve your competence in the domain of handling assessments and shaping them to serve & empower your vision & goals. Have at it.

Name one assessment you have about you and briefly describe what makes that limiting or liberating for you.

Who first delivered that assessment to you and when?

Where does that assessment exist in your body?

What possibilities does that assessment open for you?

What possibilities does that assessment close for you?

What will you do differently after looking deeper at this assessment?

What makes that useful & valuable for you?

Please, let me know what YOU think and if you use the questions, how that goes for you.

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Is Your Kingpin "Domain Specific?"

This is very cool!

In my one-on-one call with Rita today, the lady who has at times held on to the assessment of "Not being all that smart," came up with this bit of brilliance.

It started with Rita asking a classic (for me) question about Your Kingpin (click the link to read the original post) being an either/or deal. I.e.;

No matter what I do it's never enough.

OR...

No matter what I do it's never good enough.

So, I launched into my years of practiced & perfected rap about looking and seeing what you're most accostomed to wanting: More, more, more... Or, Better, better, better and that'll tell you in no uncertain terms which of the two runs you— AND, you can be sure it's ONE or the other. NOT both.

Then lovely Rita Meter Maid (no doubt inspired by the Hey Jude lyrics above, "Better, better, better..." pipes up with, "Well, is that Domain Specific?"

Dear Lord girl! Absolutely, Britishly brilliant!

Everything else is Domain Specific: Assessments, "Enemies of Learning," Competencies... So, why not Your Kingpin?

I love it! Old dog. New trick. Thanks Rita.

Please, let me know what YOU think.

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Transforming the World of Network Marketing

Here's a recent comment. Thought I'd reply in the blog itself. It's from a new friend, Phil Eldred. We spoke on the telephone about another book Phil was interested in and had ordered from me as an eBook, Breaking The Rules, by Kurt Wright. Here's Phil's comment:

Based on your personal recommendation, I have ordered Chris Majer's book The Power To Transform! I've been watching the videos on his HP2 site and I am blown away by the new commitment-based learning and management methods that he presents.

My passion at this stage of my life is to truly make a difference in the lives of people by helping them make positive transformational changes.

My question to you, John, is: How do you envision using these new methodologies to improve performance in the world of Network Marketing?

All the Best, "Dr. Phil" Eldred

My ioft' misplaced sense of humor had me call him "Dr. Phil." That he enjoyed it was a good thing (he IS a PhD, so...) Okay, to reply:

Good & interesting question, Phil— and one I've given no thought to until you asked.

With the given that transformation is a huge, powerful & positive contribution to anybody's life & work, tat alone would be enough of a benefit. For Network Marketers, which I assert is THE most people-focused business model where personal & professional growth & development has a fundamental role in both individual and team success, I believe this work would be... well... transformational.

Following along with the practices presented in the book, I'd immediately ask: What possibilities would this work OPEN for Network Marketers... and what possibilities would it CLOSE?

I'll let those questions dangle for a day or so (in the hopes that all who read this ask & answer for themselves) before I chime in <smile>

Thanks for asking Dr. Phil.

Please, let me know what you think.

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